A True MELTDOWN
by Mew-Flynn
Summary: A oneshot based on the deeper meaning of the song MELTDOWN by Kagamine Rin No character deaths . We must all learn to let go of the past...


**AN:** My first oneshot, everything was winged for the most part. Heheh, hope you enjoy.

* * *

A red sky and setting sun blend into the far off and unreachable horizon. In the distance, a large black form leans over a small town, engulfing most of it in shadow. A newly built nuclear reactor. On the other side of town, two siblings, twins in fact, contemplate this object with their 19 years of knowledge. They sit perched on one of the many small hills on the outskirts of town.

"I wonder why a small town needs something like a nuclear reactor."

The male twin lies in the grass, hands held behind his head. Short blonde hair pulled into a stubby ponytail covers his head, along with the hood of a grey jacket. Lively aquamarine eyes glow in the waning sunlight from beneath loose strands of yellow.

"What are nuclear reactors even for?"

His question is answered with silence. The twin looks to his right, where a girl with a very similar face sits. Her knees are drawn close to her small form, blonde locks waving freely in a miniscule breeze. Black pants and a deep yellow turtleneck protect her pale skin from the elements. Four white hairclips keep hair from her eyes. But her eyes aren't as lively as her twin's. They seem slightly dead, regret and self-hate overflowing. After a moment, the male continues his monologue.

"I guess it's a power source? It seems so dangerous though… The blue light it gives off at different times of the day, it's a bit unsettling. I bet if you threw or dropped something inside it'd just vanish within it…"

"…Vanish…"

He turns his head to his sister. This motion is soon followed by his entire body shifting to face her. The boy's hands leave the back of his head. He uses them to prop his form up slightly. Her eyes remain fixated on the horizon in front of them, mouth hidden by her arms. The male twin hears her sigh.

"To… dive into that nuclear reactor… and fade into that bright blue light…"

He silently listens to his sister ponder out loud. An emotion of worry eats away at the bottom of his stomach, as an unsettling giggle reaches his ears.

"That sounds so great… Maybe I should jump into it…"

It takes the boy's mind a moment to register the idea. He slowly sits up fully, a serious expression engraved into his face. Aquamarine eyes stay focused on the girl who had just given what sounded like a suicide plan. She sits there, not fazed at all.

"…What did you say?"

"I know you heard me. Don't ignore it."

Her tone is blunt. He growls under his breath. Relaxed hands tense up into fists.

"Don't say things like that."

"I can say what I want to, brother."

"You scare people when you talk like that. Including me, sister."

The female is an outcast. She's been one since a young age. The blonde girl is very introverted, and lacks active use of her voice. When she does speak, only twisted and sadistic words fall from her pale pink lips. It wasn't always like this though. Her brother recalls for a moment a happier, more energetic girl, one who always wanted to play and craved social interaction. But at the current moment in time, that girl was gone. That girl was dead. And it was all because of something she did long ago. Everyone had forgiven her for it; she was young and didn't know better. But she never was able to forgive herself. And every small mistake after that one added onto the larger one. They ate away at her very soul until she became the empty shell everyone sees now.

"Forgive me for scaring you. But wouldn't it be fitting punishment?"

Every word is emotionless and cold. Her sibling's heartbeat increases slightly, a strange mixture of emotions brewing inside of him.

"You don't deserve to die."

"Yes I do. All the times I've screwed up in my life…"

"…You've been forgiven. Don't you get that?"

Another unsettling chuckle. The hillside is overcome by silence once more. The breeze slowly dies out. The female twin finally stands from her seat in the grass. She stares at the nuclear reactor in the distance. An empty smile forces itself onto her face.

"I don't think I'll ever be truly forgiven."

"All you have to do is let the past go and move forward with your life, Rin."

Rin finally turns to her brother, gazing at him with empty eyes, still smiling. She unsteadily makes the short walk over to him. The male looks up to his twin, frowning. Aquamarine eyes drip with concern and love. They do not affect Rin at all. Bending over slightly, the female takes the boy's face in her hands. She gently presses her lips to his forehead.

"…I'll never be strong enough to do that, Len."

She pulls away from Len, smile dropping back to her neutral expression. He stares at her, words being blocked from forming. Rin turns and begins walking away. The male stumbles to his feet as the last bit of sunlight finally disappears.

"Rin, where are you going?"

"I'm going home, Len."

In the distance, the small city comes alive with lights. So does the nuclear reactor.

"…Promise me you won't do anything drastic."

Silence.

"Promise me, Rin."

"…Good night."

Len watches as his twin makes her exit, leaving him alone on the hill. The few days they spent together all ended in this matter. Rin would stay locked up in her apartment for days on end recently. And it made her brother frustrated. It made everyone who loved her frustrated. During these periods, no one could contact her. Calls and texts went unanswered. Even going in person held no response. Len was afraid that one day she wouldn't come out of there.

But he couldn't do anything. Rin's stubborn trait was still in tact apparently. She won't listen to reason. Len sighs. He clasps his hands together, holding them in front of his lips. He blows into them as a nightly chill grazes his form. Rin is long gone, yet Len still speaks toward her. His voice is quiet.

"Dear sister, I hope you find inner peace soon."

His prayer goes unheard, at least by Rin. She continues on her short walk back into town. Her pockets are occupied by her hands, her posture slumped slightly. The girl's empty eyes mainly stay drawn to the concrete below her, gazing upwards for only seconds to check her surroundings. The streets and sidewalks are still alive. The city lights are filled with color, shining brightly. They don't affect the female's mood though. As she slowly travels to her apartment, the air chills her form. Its feeling can only be compared to that of fresh ether anesthetic, inundating her mouth and nose. A languid and depressing emotion washes over her, her eyes becoming slightly lidded. Her feet finally carry her to the apartment complex she resides in.

The building is the largest in the town, dwarfed only by the nuclear reactor. Rin's room is on the very top floor. The apartment is a small one, but the view bumped up the value of it significantly. This place has been the female's home for months. It was far away from her family, from her twin. She enjoys the solitude.

She exchanges not a single word to anyone in the lobby and makes her way to the stairs. After the long and winding walk up, the girl stumbles to her door. She leans against it for a moment, digging her keys out of her pocket. Rin unlocks the door and enters the small apartment, relocking the door behind her. The female walks to her bedroom and shuts the door.

Rin sits herself in front of a vanity in her room. She silently stares at herself in the mirror, no emotion really showing on her face. Her reflection stares back at her. The emotionally dead girl blinks. Her reflection vanishes. What her hazed eyes see in its place is a different girl, much younger, dressed in what looks to be a white dress. A white bow adorns her short golden hair. The two however share the exact same expression, the exact same face. Rin blinks again, and her reflection returns. She takes a deep breath.

"Leave me alone."

No one answers her, of course. She stares for a few more moments before standing from the table. Rin makes the few steps to her bed and sits down once more. Her gaze is dragged from the floor to the nearby window. Outside, the sky is now completely dark. But the city lights below still glow. The air in the room is silent. Rin's idle hand moves to rub her stomach. A burning feeling had suddenly appeared. It was as if the fluid from a now empty lighter had set her insides aflame. The female winces. Hoping to soothe the pain, Rin slips under the covers. She wants sleep to take her. The blonde's eyes slowly move to a digital clock on a nightstand. It blinks in large square numbers the time of 9:21 pm. Rin then stares at the ceiling.

* * *

_The colors of the night give way as the room is enveloped in a sepia tone. Afternoon sunshine appears, flowing in from the window. Everything in the room vanishes, melts away... except for the bed. It is now occupied by two forms however. Two females._

_The larger female dawns futuristic attire- a short dress accompanied by a sailor collar, along with long black gloves and boots. Her clothes hug her slender anorexic-like form tightly. The dress and collar are split right down the middle- half black, half white. The only signs of color on her clothing are a single yellow bow and the glowing lines and panels on her gloves and boots. A white headset and bow are entangled in short blonde hair. Four hairclips hold bangs from lifeless eyes._

_Below her is a much younger girl with a similar face. The girl that shortly replaced Rin's reflection. She lays atop the bed sheets, calm and expressionless as the woman above her. Gloved hands surround her throat, but her breathing is unhitched. _

"_You don't have to do this."_

_The young girl's voice is filled with reason and compassion, with a great amount of knowledge for the age she gives off. She doesn't receive a worded response. Instead, her neck is squeezed even tighter. The action heeds nothing but a short silence from the little female. Her tiny throat jumps slightly._

"_Focusing on me will make things worse."_

_As the 'strangulation' continues, the older woman's eyes never leave her target. She squints slightly, an ocean of tears threatening to escape. Her form trembles a bit, but her grip never lets up. The little girl sighs, as if tired._

"_I know that everything that happened in the past isn't a lie. I know it would be nice if it was, but… Let go of me already. There's no need of holding onto memories of the past. Move on, Rin."_

_It becomes even harder for the female to keep her tears contained. Silence ensues. Her grip on the small girl's neck doesn't loosen, but doesn't tighten. They stare straight into each other's eyes. Finally, the small female breaks the silence by softly singing. It catches Rin off guard. Her hands relax._

_Hey, take me to the nuclear reactor_

_I want to dive into its core, to fly_

_It must be beautiful, my body enfolded by pure blue lights_

_Hey, take me to the nuclear reactor_

_If I dive in, then cry_

_Maybe all of my sins will be allowed in a miracle…

* * *

_

Rin opens her eyes to a pitch black room. The curtains and windows are shut, all of her furniture where it should be. She rubs her eye and props herself against the pillows. Her clothes are wrinkled, a few strands of hair out of place. The female's eyes carry themselves over to the clock. 1:57 am.

The burning sensation in her stomach returns, this time also attacking her chest. She tries to go back to sleep, but cannot. Rin grabs the remote to the television off her nightstand. She mindlessly turns the TV on. For the rest of the night and way into the next day, the female stares at the screen. Her thoughts revolve more around the passing dream though.

The next evening arrives slowly. Still unable to sleep, Rin finally removes herself from the bed. She grabs a brush from the vanity and slowly pulls it through her hair. After doing this for a few minutes, she drops the brush back onto the vanity, and begins to strip the turtleneck from her body. It is then replaced with a long sleeved black shirt. Rin exits her room. At the door, she slips on her shoes and quietly slips out. Rin takes the long walk down the stairs and heads for the terrace next to the building.

She leans against the building wall, eyes focused on the nuclear reactor. The sky behind it is red, the sun setting to its left. People pass, some also glancing at the large object. None react to Rin's presence. Her neck gives out on holding her head up. She gazes at the ground, a neutral expression on her face. Rin passes the time by observing the sounds around her. They are exactly the sounds you would expect- cars zooming by, people talking and catching up, footsteps… but one rings out in her mind over all of this.

"Rin."

She looks up. Through the moving crowd she spots a familiar face. The one of her twin. They stare at each other from a distance. Finally, Len takes a few steps in her direction. Rin sprints back inside the building. Her brother calls out for her. She tunes it out, hearing only the sound of her feet making contact with the stairs. The girl gets back to her fortress of solitude and locks the door. Her breathing is elevated as she collapses to the floor, hugging her knees. Knocking on her door comes soon after.

"Please Rin…we can talk."

She doesn't answer.

"Focusing on the past will make things worse."

She shudders, remembering the dream. But she doesn't answer.

"…When you're ready to move on, come find me, Rin…I hope you sleep well tonight."

The sound of muffled footsteps hits Rin's ears, but soon fades out. The trembling female gets to her feet once she's positive he's gone. Her shoes are kicked off into a corner as she retreats back to her bedroom. She locks that door as well, and takes a seat on the bed. The female returns to the fetal position, eyes focused on the window. About to disappear behind the horizon, the red sun causes shadows to increase in size. It resembles an eye slightly, a broken vessel causing it to pool with blood. This injured eye seems to observe the world, as it dies and drowns in the darkness of night.

Rin sighs. Hesitantly, she reaches out a single hand towards the outside world. But it soon retreats back close to her form.

* * *

_She once again finds herself in the sepia-colored room, hands wrapped around the little girl's neck. But this time, her grip is much looser. The window curtain dances in the breeze of the open window. The girl is singing again, words softly flowing off her lips like bubbles._

_Hey, take me to the nuclear reactor_

_I want to dive into its core, to fly_

_Disabled memories melting and disappearing into pure white_

_Hey, take me to the nuclear reactor_

_If I dive in, like the old days_

_Good sleep will bring dreams of tenderness…_

_Rin shakily removes her hands from her neck. The little girl continues to lie on the bed, staring upwards at her. Small lips slowly turn into a bit of a smile._

"_Yes…it's been so long since you've slept well…"_

_She nods._

"…_A good night's sleep would be really nice, wouldn't it? But that will never happen if you keep focusing on the past so much."_

_Her words finally begin to penetrate. Rin moves off of the little girl, and removes herself from the bed. She is soon followed. The two stand side by side, staring out the window._

"_Let your feelings out… Just one meltdown… one meltdown and I'll be gone."

* * *

_

Everything disappears in an instant. Rin finds herself back in her room. Night had already filled every corner, the only light coming from her blinking digital clock. She didn't even realize that she had fallen asleep. The little girl's words are still vivid in her mind. Sitting up in bed, Rin grabs a nearby pillow and holds it close to her chest. She also picks up the television remote. The electronic flickers on with the push of a button. What comes on is a presenter talking about… something. Rin is too out of it to know what it is. Her eyes feel heavy for once.

The presenter continues his little television show, an unseen audience laughing every once in a while. Every time her eyes close for a moment, the girl shows up. The laughing in the background begins to resonate in Rin's ears and mind. It quickly begins to agitate her. She finally lets her eyes rest, sinking her face into the pillow.

"_Let your feelings out…"_

She reaches for the remote and shuts the TV off, plunging her room into darkness again. She buries herself into the pillow even more, heartbeat accelerating slightly. A headache begins to form. Beneath her closed eyelids, the little girl reaches her hand out. Rin's eyes open to nothing but black. Hand shaking, the female reaches out into the darkness.

"Just one meltdown…"

A sudden sharp pain stabs her heart, and her hand retracts back. She shudders, holding the pillow as tightly as possible to her chest. Rin starts to sweat, her throat feeling swollen. Tears threaten the pour from her eyes due to the sudden pain.

"One meltdown and I'll be gone."

Rin screams into the darkness, tears spilling from her eyes. She continues to cry, letting out all the emotions she had held onto all these years. The female buries her face into the pillow, eyes still overflowing.

* * *

_Hey, take me to the nuclear reactor_

_If I dive in, then cry_

_Every part of me disappearing without regret_

_Hey, imagine the morning I say goodbye to the world_

_It'll be much more wonderful than now_

_A world where all gears of the mind are fully engaged…_

_The little girl smiles while she sings, falling into a beautiful blue ray of light. Soft tears drift away from her eyes, fading away. Soon, the girl begins fading away as well. The light starts to cover her form, engulfing her from the feet up. She breathes a sigh of content as it crawls up her body, erasing her from the world. It isn't long before nothing but her head is left._

_I believe…it exists...such a perfect world…_

_The bow that once was entangled in her hair is the last thing to vanish.

* * *

_

It takes a moment for her eyes to come into focus. The light of a sunrise filters into the room from the window. Sitting up, Rin looks out the window. It had been so long since she actually watched the sun rise. She wipes away dried tears, feeling oddly… well-rested. The sun climbs into the sky, marking the beginning of a new day. She stretches and yawns, standing up. Rin smiles for the first time in ages. A true smile.

Unlocking the bedroom door, she takes a short stroll around her apartment. The female stops beside something she hadn't touched in eternity- the phone. She stares at it for a moment before hesitantly picking it up. After running her fingers against the numbers, Rin finally inputs her old home phone number. Len answers.

"…H-hello?"

"…Len…"

"..Rin?"

"Meet me on the hill."

"What?"

"I'll see you soon."

Click. Rin sets the phone down and walks to the door. Putting on her shoes, the blonde leaves her apartment with an unusual pep in her step. She takes the elevator to the lobby. Once there, she happily waves to some other early people passing by. Some raise eyebrows, used to seeing a much more depressed girl. Rin leaves the building and starts her walk to the edge of town.

On top of the hill, Rin surveys the town. She doesn't turn around when she hears heavy panting behind her.

"Rin, I came… as fast as I could…what's wrong?"

A breeze picks up her hair slightly. She giggles. Len walks closer.

"…Rin?"

Rin finally turns around, a soft grin on her face. Her eyes shine with life and inner peace. Len's eyes dilate, surprised.

"Oh…Rin…"

"..I think I'm ready to move on, Len."

The twins stare at each other. He finally smiles, running to her and embracing his sibling. She hugs him back.


End file.
